are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
You know it’s going to be a rough day when you scream “Get fucked” at your alarm clock
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
Randomize