hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
i wish they had a 'baby daddy' section in halmark, like, "hey, i know you didn't want this child and you're doing a horrible job, but here's to making you cry on fathers day"
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
Randomize
