A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
Randomize
