he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
she pinky promised me she was 18
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
Randomize
