Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
When I say I took advantage of you when you were drunk, I mean that I convinced you to let me paint cute little panda bears on all of your toenails.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
My vagina just clenched in fear
Randomize
