Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
Todays life lesson brought to you by last nights half pitchers of cheap sangria: you'll never get the stain or the SMELL of sangria vomit out of your bedroom carpet.
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
She did NOT find it funny to come upstairs to find me with the word "MISERY" written on my forehead in magic marker and the label to the vodka bottle replaced with a scrap of paper taped around that says "COMPANY"
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
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