So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
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