Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
Can't talk, ducks in the car
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
Randomize
