I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
Randomize