dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
Randomize
