ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
Randomize
