3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
You made out with two different species that night
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
Randomize
