My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
I swear to God if you start calling your dick “my pegasus” we’re not friends anymore
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
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