like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
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