So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
Randomize
