Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
They let me keep the giant cocktail glass because I threw up in it. And made out with the bartender. Europeans are so generous. I'm getting it engraved
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
I woke up under a house in Key West
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
Randomize
