GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
New game I thought of while bored on the train. Anytime I get a text from an ex, I will randomly text a different ex. It's like a less charitable version of pay it forward.
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
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