How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
I feel like sober is me a distant relative that I only see on christmas..
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
I said "one day" and that day is not today
They both showed up at the same time... to surprise me. One had flowers and the other had chocolates. Needless to say, I will be at the bar all weekend long trying to figure out how this happens.
Randomize
