I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
I'm going to write a letter. It's going to say, Dear Every Girl Ever: Take some goddam initiative and wake me up with a blowjob and I will eat out of your hand. Love, Every Guy Ever
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
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