Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
They don't have a Valentines Day card for the married guy I'm sleeping with. It can't use the words, love, soulmate, you're the only one for me...and obviously it can't be anything related to spending the day together because that's not happening.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
Randomize
