I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
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