I love my grandma, but if I have to sit and watch one more show on Bravo, I'm gonna burn her fuckin house to the ground
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
Randomize
