If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
found the other keg... it's in the tree
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
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