just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
Do you remember some guy walking around the club saying "boner patrol" and smacking people in the dick?
Yeah, that was you
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize
