you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
Woman walking into toby keith concert: 8 months pregnant, black eye, shirt on that has a picture of a boot and the words "we'll put a boot up your ass" with an american flag printed over--the sleeves were ripped off and she had a camo cowboy hat. Greatest thing I've ever seen.
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
After getting rejected by him, I got a strangely pleasant dick pic from an unknown number with the caption: "I hope this gets you through the night ;)" It's like the Cock-Gods were shining down upon me.
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
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