I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
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