THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
We smell like vodka and hangover
Randomize
