tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
Randomize