i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
