Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
I wanna get so fucked up that I try to catch a coyote in a pillowcase, breakdance fight a lion, and send back some toast at Denny's when I see its slightly burnt.
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
Randomize
