just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
You snapped me at 3am drunk laying on your floor asking if I knew how we couldn't have predicted the housing crisis.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
You now have a new job. Call me around 1pm everyday and make sure I've eaten something. All I've had today is dick and cheesecake.
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
Randomize
