I feel great
I just peed on a car
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
it was like eating out sand paper
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
This can only be settled by a dance off.
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
Randomize
