Ikea night.
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Insert tab A into swedish slot B
babies were throwing up all over the place
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
I just wanted to check in on you and you replied with a selfie with your Coney Island waiter and the caption "after his shift we're dropping acid together"
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
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