ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
Woke up to a note written on my hand that read "just because he kisses you, doesn't mean you have to sleep with him"
next time, write it on your vagina so its more effective.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
If I had your ass I would rule the world
Randomize
