when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
In my junk email folder, there are literally 67 messages from Alcoholics Anonymous. What..the fuck.
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Randomize
