I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
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