i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
Randomize
