why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
Randomize
