Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
i found two dead squirrels on my front step this morning.. do you think they have something to do with my missing phone?
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
Randomize
