They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
Randomize
