Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
Randomize
