need another drink. this is the easiest way
Firetruck pulls up, fireman jumps out n knocks on my door, asks "do you know where Johnny lives?"
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
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