mustard is like jesus in yellow tights
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
Can you help me get ready before work? I need a look that says I'm-happy-to-help-but-I'm-hungover-so-leave-your-attitude-at-the-door-because-I'm-not-taking-anyone's-shit-today.
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
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