dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
Randomize
