yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
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