Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
only if we run a train.
done.
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
Randomize
