Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
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