It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
Randomize
