They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize
