well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
THIS IS WHAT CELL PHONES ARE FOR! So you can tell me that you're bringing your coworker who lives in the "Halleleuia community" home for a beer SO I'M NOT DRESSED IN LEATHER LINGERIE WHEN HE WALKS IN THE FUCKING DOOR!!
Randomize
